I am sharing my story not to gain anything from it. I honestly think I am just a human being who needs to let out some of the repressed anger I've been experiencing. The good news is that I overcame a lot of mental blockages. My story is simply made to inspire anyone who feels like they don't fit in or have a voice. The truth is that every.voice.matters. No matter how privileged you are, others perspectives still hold value.
It was 7am.
I had just woken up from my sleep.
the truth: I hated school.
I hated every.minute.of.it.
My school was predominantly Asian American. I have no sense of hatred towards them..other than the fact that their food smelled a little off, their women were so skinny, and that I, myself had no idea how I would possibly feel beautiful in a society that tells me otherwise.
"Can't wear that to school." my brother insisted
"why?'' I asked
"you're not built the same as them." he scolded
School wasn't really the problem. The real issue was balancing all the extracurricular activities, that made me feel like school wasn't going to work for me.
"I'm a track star!" I screamed and ran out the door.
The school was filled with wanna.be.celebrities. I never understood why certain people were deemed "cool" or "popular" when I was the full package. My hair was nice (permed), I had a great personality, and I was talented in my own way.
Going to highschool in 2013, meant that I was supposed to get over the untimely death of my sister in 2012. She paved the way, so that I could walk. She entered the battle field before I even knew what life was all about. The real question is; how was I supposed to continue this education with the thought of my sister being carried out of the hospital bed? I did it.. even when times were rough.
Drugs are a common phenomenon where I'm from. People love to use it as a coping strategy. Something to let time fly. Ever since I've been labeled as "schizophrenic" my life has never been the same. Being an active smoker for 5 years has taught me that drugs are not the answer to pain. You have to let go of who you were and invite change to your life.
Anyway, where am I going with all of this?
My childhood may have been rough, but there's no amount of struggle compared to living in survival mode.
I'm blessed that I have parents who provide food and shelter, but many of those living in third world countries don't even know where they're going to find their next meal.
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